Payback time, even when anticipated, hits home hard! Come to think of it, why should I even anticipate it; truth is, if I expect to suffer for my exertions, I only have myself to blame for overdoing it but, it also implies an acceptance of my limitations in the realm of physical and emotional stamina.
The real fly in the ointment is the virtual impossibility of determining the correct quota for a particular endeavour; on too many occasions I’ve discovered that intellectual and emotional endeavour can affect my state of physical well-being to an extent at least equal to the effect of purely physical effort. Trouble is, we have no real comparator for the effects of manual endeavour versus the intellectual/ emotional variety.
Just when I feel that I have “pacing” nailed, my spirit determines that a little extra necessary physical and emotional endeavour will give me a boost, a wallowing in the additional achievement! And, to square the circle, this is where the anticipation motif comes into play.
The last two or three days have found me floundering somewhat in the stamina stakes, a generalized fatigue accompanied by pains in hips, knees, calves, thighs, wrists and elbows, as well as an increased sensitivity to touch and unexpected sounds. The somewhat muggy atmospheric conditions, today, served to add a persistently intermittent nagging headache to my general malaise.
On a positive note though, on Tuesday I managed to start and complete my first new painting in over three years, increased the distance I walked on Friday (on top of which I made the venture with my beloved to visit a fireplace store to order a new fire surround and gas fire for our living room). Admittedly my stress levels are raised a little in anticipation of the impending disruption. The preparedness to even contemplate this event is a massive step forward. Of such little steps forward my temporary regression is made but, I move on in hope, buoyed up by the love with which I am surrounded.
As I've not managed many postings recently, this post also appears on Mal's Murmurings and Hirsute Antiquity
- living and frequently struggling with moderate M.E. -
where (bad) health, faith, politics and the joys and troubles of daily life collide.
ME
1 comment:
A new gas fire? Bold indeed, my old friend! I predict a little sedative vino to be needed before to long - trust me, I know what of I speak! TOF
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