Come early evening and tiredness verging on
exhaustion takes passing hold of me but, as a notoriously bad sleeper, I hoped
not to drift off at such an early hour. Of course resting / relaxation, in the
form of a movie, was the order of the evening; my usual evening entails the
playing of CDs and / or DVDs at some point, rarely anything too taxing on my
limited resource of stamina. Admission time; I did sleep through some of the
movie but, come the time when my beloved was ready for bed I was feeling wide
awake. I wonder if my readers will understand the sensation of being
simultaneously wide-awake and yet 95% drained of energy both physically and
emotionally.
You will have noted that as I headed to the bedroom,
to join my beloved, the signs were not exactly propitious. Those forebodings
were proved correct! As I prepared for bed a generalised sense of discomfort /
dis-ease overwhelmed me and, the night turned out to be one of tears, screams
and bellowed expletives.
Restless legs took control after an initial burning
sensation of sore tenderness took control of my toes, and that alongside of a
tortuous throbbing ache in both knees and hips. Within a short time, a
tenderness of the armpits lymph nodes began to rage alongside screaming aches
in elbows and wrists. My mind seemed to be preoccupied with a relentless
darkness as I sought for comfort and rest.
The darkness of the room created an overwhelming
sense of isolation, in spite of the fact that my beloved was soundly sleeping
beside me, almost oblivious to my cries to and against the Almighty as I
tossed, turned and struggled to find a state of composure. The blessed, albeit
temporary, release of sleep took many hours to attend to my needs.
Another day of rest is desperately sought and, I
little care whether it’s opioid, prayer, or straightforward Mother Nature
assisted.
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